Do the following have in common?
- Having to drive around the block multiple times before finding parking, when I’m late and have all 4 children.
- People who talk over top of me and tell my children the opposite of what I’m telling them.
- A child who whines all day long.
- A government official who displays no compassion.
- A mess made by another grown up that I have to clean up.
- A child who declares “I can’t” all week long.
- People who ignore me.
- Being interrupted when my head is sunk into a project. Usually writing.
- A mucky floor less than 24 hours after I’ve mopped it.
All of these things can induce rage in me.
Ridiculous, isn’t it? I mean, some of them are irritating, some down right frustrating and maddening, but rage? That might be a little out of proportion. I’m not proud of it, but some of these things can cause me to picture slamming my head through a closed window, or beating the snot out of someone. Really, truly, for real. Please try not to judge. Please know that I don’t act on those impulses, and I talk to my counselor about it. In fact, it’s a very normal affect of a PTSD diagnosis. It’s also a very normal affect of parenting. But we don’t talk too much about that, do we? Us Mama’s aren’t supposed to have bouts of rage directed at the precious being entrusted into our loving care.
I guess it always comes down to what we do with it. I run. I breath. I give myself time outs. I jump on the trampoline. I hula hooped it out the other day. Which IS ridiculous and gets you laughing, and an ab workout all in one!
Do you ever deal with parental and/or PTSD rage? If so, how do you deal with it?
Plus, for all of you who need a ridiculously, happy piece of eye candy to get you through the week? Check this out.
February 29, 2012 at 7:34 am |
Me! I rage! Oh, was I supposed to pretend that I don’t? I need to give myself more timeouts. Or try out one of the kids’ hula hoops. I wonder if they make them in maternity sizes.
March 1, 2012 at 1:16 am |
I love timeouts. For me. And I would pay money to see you hula hoop.
March 1, 2012 at 12:36 am |
Oh the rage! I never had a short temper… until I became a parent. I need to really focus on making sure I keep some balance in my life so I do not let my fuse get too short. Running is a great release for me.
Quick thing about the floors… you might want to rethink the dog! As I sit here looking at my beautiful hardwood all covered in dirty paw prints even after I wiped her feet. Sigh…
March 1, 2012 at 1:14 am |
I know, I waffle. Dog hair, dirty floors, another being to feed and care for. Versus a running companion, a hoover for all the food spills and the protection.
AAARGH. Can’t decide.
March 1, 2012 at 2:55 am |
Hoover for the food spills.
Protection.
Outweighs EVERYTHING else.
From the person with the allergy-prone shedding-inducing black dog.
Who is also the person who has pale laminate floors and pale carpet.
March 1, 2012 at 4:33 pm |
Sometimes I think rage is a natural condition of womanhood. We are raised to suppress it and so of course, it naturally turns into tears, frustration, depression, etc. And then you get called crazy.
I joined 30 min hit, so I take my anger out of Bob the dummy. It makes me so happy to hit something it’s ridiculous! I wish I had a punching bag in the basement. If someone asks me if Dora is on ONE MORE TIME…..
March 1, 2012 at 5:14 pm |
I think you are spot on.
You know, you can find punching bags on craigslist for cheap. I know, because we have one.
March 2, 2012 at 3:54 am |
You are not alone my friend. I have the rage too.
Lately I’ve been trying to pay attention to it a little bit more i.e. recognize when it is just a teeny flame of irritation and acknowledge that it is happening, that it is there. Then I’m trying to do a bit of a cognitive over-ride – is this really something to be that irritated about? Is this really worth it? Its seeming to help a bit … mostly it is kind of preventing the super-fast ramp up from minor irritation to full-blown explosive anger within a few moments.
That … and chocolate. Exercise. Alone time. Writing
March 2, 2012 at 5:31 am |
Well apparently according to a single-Mum friend of mine who’s a few years – only a few years – older than me rage is a condition that even if you haven’t had it before pops up as a side effect of the menopause! And I’m turning 47 this month and OMG!!!!!! It gets worse? My poor kids.
March 2, 2012 at 10:45 pm |
I don’t do parental rage. But, you know, I got perimenopausal hormones all over the place and an almost-four-year-old. So it’s just a matter of time…
March 8, 2012 at 5:27 pm |
hey there!
yes, i deal with it too. it’s way down deep, and i keep it there (most of the time) with loooots of exercise (good ol’ calming endorphins!). i fit it in on my non-school days, while the kids are in school (this is 3 days a week for Sam). then on sat. when the hubs is home i can do my long run. if i’m about to lose it with my kids, either i walk outside or i send them outside and let it all chill out. but GEEZ it’s hard!!! i hear ya!